You’re happy miserable? Really!

When you’re a positive person, something that becomes glaringly obvious is how many people out there choose to wallow and be negative.  This is not a criticism of those people.  It simply keeps bringing me back to one of my life themes – gratitude!  I am so grateful that I have grown up to be a positive, happy and content person.

It’s not to say I’ve had the perfect life, far from it in fact, I was born and raised in Greyville, which is only glamorous 1 day a year when the Durban July is on.  My single mom was so poor, we lived in the Corporation Flats (for my English friends I believe that equates to Council Flats), she taught me wonderful skills like how to feed a family when there’s no money (we lived on lots of boerie and lentils and rice!) and most importantly we taught each other love!  My family LOVES each other, unashamedly!  I went to public school, my mom couldn’t even afford school fees for that!  I got part-time jobs from the age of about 15, and helped support the household, I put myself through my tertiary education – working full-time while I studied full-time!  You don’t really want to raise a family in the Corporation Flats – let me tell you – your children are exposed to child abuse, spousal abuse, flashers, hobos, drug addicts, you name it – I’ve experienced it.  At my insistence we moved from the Council Flats when my brother was young, and we moved and we moved and we moved, because we couldn’t afford rent increases!  I met a boy at church, got engaged, gained a ton of weight, learned about sex and love, and was dumped!  I’ve been suicidal, and I’ve been desperately unhappy.  I’ve have good relationships and I’ve had shit ones.  In short, I have lived!  In my book, it’s okay to be sad, it’s not okay to wallow in it for months and years on end!

BUT …

You learn better, you do better!

And I choose happiness!  It didn’t happen to me!  I just chose to stop wallowing and surround myself with better people and better experiences!  I have far from the perfect life, but I am so blessed it’s obscene!

My wish is that I inspire someone who may be unhappy today to be grateful tomorrow.  Love yourself and your life today like there’s no tomorrow!

One day on my tomb stone, I hope it will read “She was determined, she chose better and she was happy.  She was grateful. She was a friend.”  Maybe one day there will be additions to that like, “She was a wife.  She was a mother.” but if not, that’s great too.  Whatever it brings, I’m enjoying my life 🙂

1 Comment

  1. Anonymous on October 2, 2010 at 5:29 am

    Remember. Your past does not determine your future. This is the first time I have managed to get to read your blog and was really moved by it. Comming from someone who knows you (I mean really knows the type of person you are) you deserve every happiness. Greyville was good for the people who learnt from their life experiences there and wanted to do better and be better.