Just call me Candi … Candi Pants

Had a quite well behaved night out last night with Duffy and Mrs K at Taco Zulu, but there were some hilariously unforgettable moments that you will so enjoy, so here they are …

Taco Zulu was uncharacteristically quiet last night, but just as well really, because as I type this, I am at the boutique working.  Sadly, a quiet pub means way less entertainment factor, which is probably why we entertained a particularly hot 23 (and a half – don’t forget the half!) year old water polo playing environmental science student!  Rolling eyeballs!  Have to admit this boy was hotter than any boy his age deserves to be, and he was smart and charming – a real lothario in the making!  And well worth a flirt, especially in a quiet pub.  Duffy takes the cake last night, he asked her name and  without a moments hesitation introduced herself as, “Candi … Candi Pants” in the tartiest voice you have ever heard.  Without skipping a beat he asked her parents names to which she replied, “Peter … Peter Pants and Cutey … Cutey Pants”.  God, we almost wet ourselves laughing!

So, it turns out the lothario and his mates were out for one of their birthdays, and they were all proponents, or perhaps converts is the more appropriate description, of “The Game”.  My advise to all boys, forget The Game!  It’s fucked up!  The lothario’s rather unattractive mate came over after he had left and tried to convince us that the only reason we had entertained his friend, the lothario, is because he was playing “The Game”.  Dude, rest assured, they only reason we entertained the Lothario as long as we did, and you NOT SO MUCH, is because he was frikking hot and totally shaggable (even though a child!) and you, sadly WERE NOT!  The Game had no effect.  Trust us!  LOL!

The Architect joined us out later, nice boy, but seemingly obsessed with catching a spouse, which is terribly off putting!  The low light of my evening was a discussion about why I am single, this is a supremely uninteresting topic to me, because I clearly missed out on the “desperate to hook a spouse gene” when they were handing them out.  The fact that I’m single really doesn’t worry me as much as it seems to worry others LOL!  And when I meet new people I am not sizing up their marriageability, I’m just either enjoying their company … or not!  I had an internal laugh out loud when, after a discussion about how well the boutique was doing, he said, “Well I hope your success at the boutique brings you a husband”.  Glory!  Yes, because after all my life will not be complete, happy or fulfilling without a husband!  Oh puuullllleeeeaaaassseee!!! Spare me!