So, this is a prime example of why I am single… a now happily married acquaintance sets me up on a blind date with her ex-fiance, who “on paper” sounds perfect for me, a real estate developer, from “old money”, right age, in shape, lovely guy, etc. So we make an arrangement to meet for dinner at a local restaurant at 7pm. Let’s call this man Don. I arrive at the restaurant at 7pm and Don is missing in action. I wait 5 minutes … then 10 minutes … at 15 minutes I am getting up to leave when my mobile rings … Don apologises and informs me he’s running 5 minutes late. “Really?”, I think, glancing at my watch, so after chit chat and another 5 minutes, Don arrives. Okay, so initial impression not great and I would hardly describe Don as a hunk, but I decide to give him the benefit of the doubt and enjoy my evening. We head over to our table and I watch Don pull out his chair and sit down. Okay, so chivalry is clearly dead in this neck of the woods. Now, I’m not some raving lunatic, but forgive me, on a first date, be a gentleman people, come on! So I pull out my chair and sit. The conversation was really the cherry on top for me… First of all, a sidebar, Don and his best friend, let’s call him Thomas, refer to each other as Tommy and Donny, now I’m sorry again, but you are nearly 40 years old dude, diminutives are just weird… on with the conversation… after telling me how wonderful I am and attractive and wondering why I’m still single, Donny and I have a conversation about dating, during which Donny advises me that he and Tommy have discovered the secret to dating… hanging on the edge of my seat, I say, “Pray tell, enlighten me, what is the secret?”, Donny tells me the secret is to date a girl from the wrong side of the tracks (Toti was the specific example he used) because that way you can go over to that side of town, take her out to dinner, with a bottle of wine and everything, he says (as if this is really an extravagance!), and you can 9 out of 10 times take her home and have your way with her, and the best part he tells me, is that this whole exercise will only cost R200!
Wow! What a gem of a guy! Let me think now, Donny, Single, Donny, Single, shew, tough choice (NOT!) – I choose Single!